Mar. 27th, 2021

kugisaki: (pic#14617128)







she made a life of me

and it turned me off of feeling





Dust covers the window, but light slips through--
it always does--through dust or cracks or under doors.

Every day at dusk, the sun, through branches,
hits a river's bend & sends silver slivers to the walls.

No one's there to see this. No one.
But it dances there anyway, that light,

& when the wind weaves waves into the water
it's as if lit syllables quivered on the bricks.

Then the sun sinks, swallowed by the dark. In that dark
more dust, always more dust
settles--sighs over everything.

There is no silence there, something always stirs
not far away. Small rags of noise.

Rilke said most people will know only a small corner of their room.

I read this long ago & still don't know how to understand
that word only, do you?

Where are you? I think of you so often

and search for you in every face that comes between me & dust,
me & dusk--first love, torn corner from this life.
room in antwerp by laure-ann bosselaar



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kugisaki: (Default)







resonance

[ a kugisaki nobara playlist ]







01. suddenly i see by kunstall

she fills up every corner like she's born in black and white
makes you feel warmer when you're trying to remember what you heard



02. brand new city by mitski

but if i gave up on being pretty, i wouldn't know how to be alive
i should move to a brand new city and teach myself how to die



03. black sheep by kailee morgue

got balls of steel, got an automobile for a minimum wage
got real estate, i'm buying it all up in outer space



04. sensitive by dreamer isioma

i'd never sell out for a check, you stupid motherfucker
i'll buy a house and on my own, i put that on my mother



05. boys ain't shit by saygrace

you wonder why I got a attitude
you make it hard for me to play nice



06. build a bitch by bella poarch

i'm filled with flaws and attitude
so if you need perfect, i'm not built for you



07. primadonna by marina & the diamonds

all i ever wanted was the world
i can't help that i need it all




i don't believe in consequence
i make the rules up in my head



09. simmer by hayley williams

oh, how to draw the line between wrath and mercy?
gotta simmer, simmer, simmer, simmer, simmer down



10. are you satisfied? by marina

are you satisfied with an average life?
do i need to lie to make my way in life?



11. i love it when hot guys cry by link lauren

i might even pull his hair, put him in the electric chair
he can kick and scream and call my name



12. i eat boys by chloe moriondo

hands off kid or you'll wake up in my basement
and all of the feds have to break in



13. anthems for a seventeen-year-old girl by broken social scene

bleaching your teeth, smiling flash, talking trash, under my window
park that car, drop that phone, sleep on the floor, dream about me